User blog:Arvin30p/Side Story - Hello & Goodbye

 “ A-chan, what’s the problem?” “Nothing…” “You must be looking at Hiro-sama again, right?”

 My name is A****, but people call me A-chan for somre reasons. If you ask me why; they say that it fits my personality well. But inn my case; I think my name does justice.

 Hiro Raven, is a person every girl hiddenly admire in this school; I don’t know why they feel that way but I can confirm that its not hypnotism. Its just that he is exuding extra ordinary amounts of loneliness that triggers our maternal instincts to some degree. But even so; despite our gaze; he only looked at few individuals that have somewhat caught his attention.

 One of them was his childhood friend and what we believe is his fiancé Kino-san; she is mature; stylish and very smart. But she is also a very busy person who is already managing some business ventures and can be seen absent due to her commitments; truly; a High schooler who is already a manager of a company is something we can’t achieve. The other one is a underclassman named Akari. She is cheerful but at the same time; cunning… I don’t know if she is just taking advantage of Hiro-sama’s kindness but I feel that he looks at her differently; far from pity or a sense of responsibility. The other one would be the class President, Violet-san; I forgot her name at this point but if she hears me say this; she’ll get mad at me. She would represent one of the many fans of Hiro-sama but at the same time; she is the one who managed to take the initiative to talk to him when no one else can’t. I wished that I can do that myself but… I don’t think I have the guts to do so.

 Anyhow, asides from the fact that I am just a simple girl; I have a very strange condition; doctors said that I won’t be able to graduate since it’s the type of illness that kills me from the inside. I think I won’t last until the last day of summer. Given that I get tired easily one of these days.

 “ Hey A-chan, won’t you go with us this summer festival?” “Hmm… I’ll think about…” “OH right; you can invite Hiro-sama since the usual guard isn’t around. Also… Violet-san isn’t available to represent us… so…”

 I heard that Kino-sama will be out to do some business so leaving the poor Hiro-sama alone. I guess it would be a good time for me to ask him.

 Unexpectedly; he accepted my invite. I was happy that day but…

 “ A-chan; how did you do it?” “I just asked him normally.” “Eh? But… we have done that so…”

 Everyone is looking at me with eyes filled with envy.

 “ Say, did you somewhat hypnotized Hiro-sama?” “Wait. I didn’t do that… I have no capacity to do such a thing.” “But to notice you… we are…”

 Somehow; during that interrogation time with some of the girls; a voice came to save me.

 “ Leave her alone. She did it by herself and thus you have neither the rights to criticize her actions nor accuse her of doing something underhanded. I am ashamed of you girls.”

 The rest of the girls shut up and when I thanked her, she took my hand and pulled me up.

 “ Did they hurt you?” “Nope… Thank you… Um…” “Call me Hiromi.” “Thanks Hiromi-san.”

 Hiromi-san pulled me up and she examines me closely. Yup; I can also sense that she is jealous but… “Yup, totally normal. I wonder why… I guess I really need the guts myself to ask him.”

<p style="margin-bottom: 0in; font-variant: normal; letter-spacing: normal; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; orphans: 2; widows: 2"> After that; it would be the last time I would be meeting Hiromi-san.

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<p style="margin-bottom: 0in; font-variant: normal; letter-spacing: normal; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; orphans: 2; widows: 2"> Tanabata is the day when I told him my feelings… but I failed; I knew it right from that start that someone as plain as me have no match to anyone but… I never even managed to remove that frown from his face. I am disappointed with myself.

<p style="margin-bottom: 0in; font-variant: normal; letter-spacing: normal; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; orphans: 2; widows: 2"> I ran away and when I thought of coming home with tears in my eyes, I hesitated and I decided to walk somewhere to dry them up but…

<p style="margin-bottom: 0in; font-variant: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; widows: 2"> “ Ugh, is it today?”

<p style="margin-bottom: 0in; font-variant: normal; letter-spacing: normal; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; orphans: 2; widows: 2"> My body is assaulted with pain all over that I immediately fainted that instant; but with that pain; I gained my consciousness and with that; I wrestled through the pain as that mysterious illness starts to devour me. Every part of me is being crushed and teared up that there were no words to describe the pain I am feeling inside; It was a miracle that I can call myself sane despite this pain. The bout lasted a few more minutes until it subsides; Soon enough; I bled all over and I collapsed due to shock.

<p style="margin-bottom: 0in; font-variant: normal; letter-spacing: normal; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; orphans: 2; widows: 2"> When I woke up; I was already at the crossroads when I met a split image of myself…

<p style="margin-bottom: 0in; font-variant: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; widows: 2"> “ Hello….” “…” “Are you…” “I am you.” “?” “I am sorry but your body isn’t perfected for me to possess.” “What do you mean?” “Simple… you have already died before I can take over… but…” “But…” “If I can force a connection with your body; It will take time for me to heal all the wounds so are you willing to gamble on that; if I do it so… your spirit will assimilate with mine and you won’t be able to face him.” “I don’t mind.” “…” “If I can be with Hiro-kun once again; even If I become a monster; I shall do it!” “A monster… that’s a nice ring to it but… I am nowhere near that term but you can also call me something along the way if you decide to fight for what is right.”

<p style="margin-bottom: 0in; font-variant: normal; letter-spacing: normal; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; orphans: 2; widows: 2"> I looked around and I saw my body which was already in the morgue. It was already in the state of rigor mortis.

<p style="margin-bottom: 0in; font-variant: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; widows: 2"> “ You might have died… but with our efforts; we will make it through. Are you with me?” “Yeah.”

<p style="margin-bottom: 0in; font-variant: normal; letter-spacing: normal; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; orphans: 2; widows: 2"> I held hands with the other me; and I dive back to my dead body seizing control of it once more and made an escape towards the ocean.

<p style="margin-bottom: 0in; font-variant: normal; letter-spacing: normal; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; orphans: 2; widows: 2"> As we fell towards the deep abyss… I felt that I was not alone… as a matter of fact; it was a torrent of souls that continuously calling out the world above.

<p style="margin-bottom: 0in; font-variant: normal; letter-spacing: normal; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; orphans: 2; widows: 2"> My body soon enclosed to a capsule underneath the ocean, which will serve as a way to heal myself… but at the same time…

<p style="margin-bottom: 0in; font-variant: normal; letter-spacing: normal; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; orphans: 2; widows: 2"> I felt a presence way stronger that those around me. But that presence lasted for a moment that I resumed to my cold sleep. With that; I will wait for the right moment until I was fully healed. I’m sorry Hiro-sama, I don’t think I can meet you anymore… Goodbye.

<p style="margin-bottom: 0in; font-variant: normal; letter-spacing: normal; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; orphans: 2; widows: 2"> And as I close my eyes; the old me started to sleep as well.

<p style="margin-bottom: 0in; font-variant: normal; letter-spacing: normal; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; orphans: 2; widows: 2"> But, even though she said that I won’t be able to come back… for some reason… Deep inside me; I try to call out for his name… my self… my other self… my wicked other self…

<p style="margin-bottom: 0in; font-variant: normal; letter-spacing: normal; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; orphans: 2; widows: 2"> Before I knew it; something sinister seeped out of me and broke free before I could even contain it. It was formless… and at the same time… very disturbing.

<p style="margin-bottom: 0in; font-variant: normal; letter-spacing: normal; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; orphans: 2; widows: 2"> I can’t do anything since I am still recuperating, but if that thing comes out… I don’t know what will happen if it affects anyone.

<p style="margin-bottom: 0in; font-variant: normal; letter-spacing: normal; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; orphans: 2; widows: 2"> But it was too late… I let her go and she now roams to places where my sense I can’t reach.

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<p style="margin-bottom: 0in; font-variant: normal; letter-spacing: normal; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; orphans: 2; widows: 2"> “Akitsushima…” “What is it Admiral?”

<p style="margin-bottom: 0in; font-variant: normal; letter-spacing: normal; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; orphans: 2; widows: 2"> I opened up my eyes from my bad dream and I was greeted by the Admiral who was looking at me.

<p style="margin-bottom: 0in; font-variant: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; widows: 2"> “ It seems that you are troubled.” “Ah, I just dreamt of something in the past.” “Your past? Somehow; I feel interested to your past.” “Eh? But it’s not that special.” “Special or not, it’s rare for a shipgirl to have a past.” “Really?” “Only a few here has their own past; I can assure that.”

<p style="margin-bottom: 0in; font-variant: normal; letter-spacing: normal; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; orphans: 2; widows: 2"> It seems that he was keen on knowing my past but…

<p style="margin-bottom: 0in; font-variant: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; widows: 2"> “ Sorry… I can’t tell you my past yet.” “I kind of expected that, given how we are now. But…”

<p style="margin-bottom: 0in; font-variant: normal; letter-spacing: normal; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; orphans: 2; widows: 2"> Ah, I saw his lonely look on his face; I must vanquish that soon.

<p style="margin-bottom: 0in; font-variant: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; widows: 2"> “ Admiral I recall that you always went to the same place during Tanabata, was there a reason for that?” “Ah… It’s just that; during those times; it was the time when I have finally understand that I am human too…” “?” “Well, it would be too difficult to explain this to you so… I’ll tell you a story of a very clumsy girl.” “Eh?”

<p style="margin-bottom: 0in; font-variant: normal; letter-spacing: normal; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; orphans: 2; widows: 2"> Wait; what do you mean a clumsy girl?

<p style="margin-bottom: 0in; font-variant: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; widows: 2"> “ I can’t recall her full name but… everyone calls her A-chan. She is plain but she is quite a happy person. I longed to be like her too… since I keep wallowing on my past.” “Eh?”

<p style="margin-bottom: 0in; font-variant: normal; letter-spacing: normal; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; orphans: 2; widows: 2"> Wait, don’t tell me that… all these times, he was willing to accommodate me? But… why?

<p style="margin-bottom: 0in; font-variant: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; widows: 2"> “ But you see. This girl, she is happy and all; sometimes clumsy; but she is very strong; I never knew she was suffering from an unknown illness that would kill her without any reason at all. But she never despaired on such a thing; if It was me; I would really feel bad about it.”

<p style="margin-bottom: 0in; font-variant: normal; letter-spacing: normal; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; orphans: 2; widows: 2"> Ah; why… Why my tears started welling up? I want to do something but…

<p style="margin-bottom: 0in; font-variant: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; widows: 2"> “ Akitsushima… You know this story; right?” “Wha…” “I was just thinking something about my past when I recall that girl… she made me realize that I was human all along. And when you and that girl bear that resemblance… I was a bit confused as if the heavens have toyed with me and gave a carbon copy of you… but it turns out… Akiho… thank you for coming back.”

<p style="margin-bottom: 0in; font-variant: normal; letter-spacing: normal; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; orphans: 2; widows: 2"> No way; he knew my name? But… But… even my close friends have forgotten about it and most people who knew my name prefer calling me A-chan thus; I gave up on making them remember my name but…

<p style="margin-bottom: 0in; font-variant: normal; letter-spacing: normal; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; orphans: 2; widows: 2"> My face was a mess… I can’t control my tears anymore as I tear up right in front of the admiral; for some reason; we are alone in his office as if no one dared to interrupt what was taking place inside.

<p style="margin-bottom: 0in; font-variant: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; widows: 2"> “ Anyways… I kept forgetting your name until Violet told me your name. Surprisingly; It was like that all along. Sorry About that.”

<p style="margin-bottom: 0in; font-variant: normal; letter-spacing: normal; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; orphans: 2; widows: 2"> Ah, he’s hopeless… I understand why I can’t leave him… and that same goes with everyone else… If we are gone from his life… I am sure, that he won’t be able to move on.

<p style="margin-bottom: 0in; font-variant: normal; letter-spacing: normal; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; orphans: 2; widows: 2"> And so, I wiped my tears and held his hand; I somehow don’t want to leave his side so…

<p style="margin-bottom: 0in; font-variant: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; widows: 2"> “ Hiro-san, umm… If we cannot become lovers; please just let me stay by your side… ummm… like a joke character… or something?” “C’mon now; who wants to make a joke character their companion? You are special to me too so…”

<p style="margin-bottom: 0in; font-variant: normal; letter-spacing: normal; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; orphans: 2; widows: 2"> The door opened and what greeted me is Sazanami-san who looked like she wants to go inside already.

<p style="margin-bottom: 0in; font-variant: normal; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; widows: 2"> “ I would like to explain what is happening right now?” “Right…”

<p style="margin-bottom: 0in; font-variant: normal; letter-spacing: normal; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; orphans: 2; widows: 2"> I forgot; most of them didn’t know it was me after all. Oh well, this is enough for me to feel good but… I wished that this time around… my feelings would reach the crevices of his heart.

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<p style="margin-bottom: 0in; font-variant: normal; letter-spacing: normal; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; text-align: right;"> - End

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